Paris knows nothing about American sports

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Bon jour from Paris.

Funny thing about large cities in different countries: They don’t care about how the Giants came back against the Reds, or that they wrote another chapter in the “Why Cincinnati Hates San Francisco” book. The only thing they know about the World Series is that the team from vaugely-French-named St. Louis was also thumped by the decidedly-Spanish-themed San Francisco.

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They don’t care that the Ducks have squashed everyone, even with their red-shirt freshmen QB, and that Kansas St. dodged them in typical Bill Snyder fashion, because there is no way that K. State would be ranked where it is if Snyder hadn’t predictably backed out of their commitment to go to Autzen.

Yep. Kansas State was on the schedule for Eugene this year, but no one here knows or cares. Based on how it’s worked out so far for the Snyder-Chickens, can you blame them? Why play a tough game on the road against a national championship-caliber team when you can play East Jesus St. instead and still leapfrog Oregon in the BCS polls?

Strangely enough, Lance Armstrong is the sports news here. This may explain why I have spent more time trying to follow the Giants and the Ducks via international means than I have spent paying attention to the sports news here. Dude cheated. Got cancer. Avoided detection for awhile. Got even more famous than he already was. Got busted. Hey Lance, you might want to answer your phone – It says Barry Bonds is on the line.

No one in France knows that the State of Oregon has become Alabama-esque and placed both of their University football teams into the BCS poll, Bill Snyder be damned.

No one here knows who Pete Carroll is, or why he keeps losing to and complaining about Jim Harbaugh. Maybe Reggie Bush will let you rent a spare room when you need it Pete. I’m pretty sure he’s got a flat here on the Left Bank to provide a change of pace to the place in SoCal.

And I’m pretty sure no one here knows who Joe Starkey is, or remembers “The band is on the field!” but happy anniversary to him anyway. It felt just plainly wrong to see Cal-Stanford playing before the end of the season, but in Paris, you take what you can get.

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